Journies of the Heart

“Remember this song? This is still how i feel when i am with you.”

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“BASTA’T KASAMA KITA”

(DingDong Avanzado)

Sa tuwing tayo’t magkakalayo
hindi matahimik ang puso ko
bawat sandali hanap kita
‘di mapakali hanggang muling kapiling ka
dahil kung ika’y makita ng
labis labis ang tuwang nadarama
magisnan lamang ang kislap ng iyong mata
kahit ano pa ay kakayanin ko na

 CHORUS:
Basta’t kasama kita
lahat magagawa
lahat ay maiaalay sa’yo
basta’t kasama kita
walang kailangan pa
wala nang hahanapin pa
basta’t kasama kita

 giliw,sana ay ikaw na nga
ang siyang mananatiling kasama ko
dahil kung ika’y mawawalapati lahat sa buhay ko’y maglalaho
ngunit…(REPEAT CHORUS)

walang kailangan pa
wala nang hahanapin pa
basta’t kasama kita

I told you before why i stopped attending weddings, birthdays, christening/dedications right?  And i told myself that im over and done with running away from the “Question”.

Boy, i was wrong… Last November with the request of my tita which is also my godmother, i attended her birthday celebration.  As relatives and friends keep coming… i somehow sense that something fishy is going on.  She would always introduce me to a single guy that would come to her house.  And i was like… uh uh uh… this is not good!  Definitely a bad idea.

What i did? I hide in the kitchen! Totally lost myself with arranging the foods, orchestrating the kitchen and the foods that need to be brought to the table.  I thought i was saved… but boy oh boy, she looks for me and the whole process of introductions, saying hi’s and goodbyes begins again.

Sometimes i was wondering, are they pushing me to get married jsut because theyare happy that they are married? Or are they pushing me to get married to share the suffering that they have? hehehe… just joking!

Whatever their reason, i know that are just thinking of me and my happiness.

What they do not know is… i am happy just the way things are in my life right now.  But of course i’ll be happier when Mr. Fix It, fixed my heart.

Second week of July when we rushed my grandfather to the hospital because of his chronic lung disease, which eventually led to his death after 2 weeks of almost living in the hospital.

When he was still alive and little bit strong, i would always take time to massage his body especially his feet.  One evening when i was massaging his hands, he hold my hands for awhile and told me, ” Imaginin mo na lang na intsik yung minamasahe mo.  Bakit kasi gustung gusto mo sila.  Magpapakasal ka na ba sa intsik?” I laughed out loud.  Right there and then, naiyak ako… here was an old blind and deaf man, and yet he clearly hears and sees my heart.  He knew how i love the chinese people and longing to be with them… but somehow, God is still keeping me here in the Philippines…  for what reason? I do not even know.

If only my grandfather can see see the name written in my heart… im sure he would approved it.  Why? Because that name is the one who makes me happy, accepts me, and continues to make me crazy.